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The Weekly Wit, Issue #007
September 11, 2007

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Now, sit back, prepare for a chuckle or two, and enjoy!




New Additions to the Website!

New stories have been added to the Mark Twain section! Even more have been added since last week! Visit our Mark Twain page to check out the new additions.

New Mark Twain Stories.





In the Shade of a Lemonade Straw

Tinkle, tinkle, bit of ice!
Jiminy, but you sound nice,
As you clink and clink and fade
In a glass of lemonade!






Bugville Fair

IT JUST BEATS ALL!

Opening of the Bugville county fair.





Advice With A String To It

Two young men, of short acquaintance, were talking together when George, the older of the two, became suddenly very confidential.

"I am much bothered," he said. "I can marry a wealthy widow whom I don’t love or a poor girl that I do love intensely. What shall I do?"

"Listen to you heart," advised his companion, "and marry the one you love."

"You are right, my friend. I shall marry the girl."

"Then can you give me the widow’s address?"






Four Women Standing

A POPULAR PROPOSITION

"Do you believe in a tax on bachelors?"

"Yes, indeed! Which one shall we attack first?"






THE WIND-UP

We read the advertisements,
Consulted railroad maps,
And ate our hasty lunches
With guide-books in our laps.
We asked the price of tickets
By steamer or by rail,
To half a hundred places
Beyond the reach of mail.

We argued on the merits
Of cottage or hotel,
And quarreled over seaside
And spa and mountain dell;
And since we could not settle
Just where we wished to roam,
The same as every summer
Behold! We stayed at home.

Minna Irving






It’s great to be American. Always has been. Enjoy!



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